Money

...and debt

Photo by Alice Pasqual on Unsplash

First to my new subscribers: Welcome! All my stacks are free to read, so if you can’t afford to add another thing to your budget, believe me I know how it is. For all my paid subscribers: Thank you so much, I’m truly grateful.

Please consider becoming a paid subscriber. I appreciate every heart, every comment. And for my paid subscribers, your patronage helps me more than you know. I live on Social Security, and scrape by. Gone are my days of travel, splurging on anything, giving gifts to friends and family. Literally every dollar counts.

Money. The first time I remember thinking about money as a problem was when Mom and I went looking for scrap iron to sell to get enough money for her to buy fabric to make my Christmas dress. Before then I don’t think she’d ever mentioned needing money. She made all my clothes and I never gave a thought to where the fabric came from.

Photo by Kevin Dunlap on Unsplash

Early on, I had a slip made from a feed sack with lettering on it. I was two or three and I lifted my dress in public and exclaimed that Mom had made me a slip with my name on it. (If my name was Flour, I guess. Ha.) My favorite outfit was made from sheer curtains (an off the shoulder blouse) and a circle skirt made of a couch cover.

Me before I knew what money was, completely debt-free

But Mom wanted green taffeta and a green plaid for the collar and trim. I think it cost $1.68 including shipping from the catalogue. But we found enough scrap iron and sold it, she got the fabric and I had a beautiful dress.

After Dad died when I was seven, I became very aware of how scarce money was. Mom had to work two jobs and we had to rent out our house and live in a camping trailer for the winter in order to keep our home and survive.

Me and my sister in the camping trailer we lived in, no water, no bathroom, but Mom tried to make it look nice

My first jobs were babysitting for fifty cents an hour, until I got a job babysitting five kids all day five days a week for five dollars. At thirteen I got my Social Security card and went to work at the Houston House restaurant for twenty-five cents an hour.

I’ve worked in factories, restaurants, bars, and got my first white-collar job at Cass Bank and Trust in St. Louis when I was eighteen.

I was THRILLED to get my first white collar job here in 1962

From then on, I worked in banks, for the US government, for an insurance company, and finally as a legal representative for a private firm.

I’ve never stopped working of course. I just don’t get paid for my work very often as a poet and playwright, sometime novelist.

Me writing in 1973

If I didn’t have debt (accrued necessarily for living expenses), I’d be okay. All the money I saved for retirement went toward helping to raise my grandchildren. I do not regret that for a minute. I invested in their future and it has helped them become who they are.

My daughter and I live together, share the mortgage and utility payments, and we are great companions. We never fight, rarely even disagree about anything (and then always resolve it without problems).

It would be nice not to have to worry about things like needing a new roof or water heater or furnace. It would be nice to be able to have the house painted.

When we had an underground water leak that cost $3200 to repair, I had to borrow the money. When I needed a new phone, I found the least expensive option and charged it to my credit card.

But I pay my bills on time. Every time I have extra, I use it to pay down debt.

I think I’m lucky that way. So many people do not have a home. Don’t have enough food. Don’t have great relationships with their families. Don’t have medical insurance.

I am grateful for everything I have. I take nothing for granted. I just wish none of us had to worry about money -- ever. If I won the lottery (which I rarely play), I would use the money to pay down debt. Mine first, but then I’d pay off everyone’s debt that I was able to. No luxury items, no vacations, just pay off as much debt as possible. No one should have to live under the cloud of debt.

I was in my thirties before women were allowed to have credit cards or mortgages in their own names. It seemed like a blessing to be able to have these things at last, but that was when any interest above ten percent was usury. There were laws against charging more.

Do you have a credit card with less than ten percent interest? Ha. I have a card now (with zero balance, btw) that charges 37% interest! I won’t be using that card, ever.

What is your relationship with money? with debt? I’d love to hear from you.